Skipping Church

I grew up in Christian circles where an unwritten rule persisted during the summers - Christians must go to church while on vacation; particularly pastors and ministry leaders. Though I can’t remember anyone actually asking where my parents took us to church when we were on vacation, it seemed to be implied by many of our family friends and other church members that good Christians go to church on vacation. Furthermore, I’ve had pastors who as much as said this was the case from the pulpit, colleagues who would deride me as unspiritual for thinking otherwise, and church members who would be aghast if they knew their pastor skipped church services while on vacation.

As I’ve gotten older, became a husband and father, and entered vocational ministry, I’ve wondered about not only the logical but theological truthfulness of such a sentiment. Here are my conclusions…like them or not, here they are.

I want to turn your attention to three key Bible passages involving Jesus’ ministry. All three involve the same historical incident in the life of Jesus and his disciples. The incident in question is commonly referred to as the Feeding of the 5,000. Below are the pertinent passages.

Mark 6:30-32 - The apostles returned to Jesus and told him all that they had done and taught. ³¹ And he said to them, “Come away by yourselves to a desolate place and rest a while.” For many were coming and going, and they had no leisure even to eat. ³²  And they went away in the boat to a desolate place by themselves.

Luke 9:18 - Now it happened that as he was praying alone, the disciples were with him. And he asked them, “Who do the crowds say that I am?”

Matthew 14:23 - And after he had dismissed the crowds, he went up on the mountain by himself to pray. When evening came, he was there alone,

When you piece together what the synoptic gospel writers record, here’s what you come away with. Jesus had sent out the twelve disciples in six teams of two each to minister to their Israelite brethren (Mark 6:7; Luke 9:1). He gave them authority over demons and the power to heal the sick. They had been out serving the people for an undisclosed amount of time. It was probably several days, if not a couple of weeks. They were out long enough to have to be dependent on other people for food and shelter (Mark 6:8-10; Luke 9:2-6), for King Herod to hear of Jesus and his disciples ministry among the people (Mark 6:14), and for Jesus to receive the news that John the Baptist had died (Mark 6:15-20; Luke 9:7-10).

When the disciples finally returned to Jesus they were exhausted and hungry. Their ministry and service to others had so worn them out that Jesus wisely instructed them to take their leave from serving and interacting with others in ministry and get away from it all. These twelve men had been dealing with the problems, sicknesses, and needs of everyone other than themselves for long enough. It was time for rest and refreshment. Of course, the context of each of these passages notes that when the people figured out where Jesus and the disciples were they made their way to them. Rather than heed the advice of the disciples and let the people take care of themselves, Jesus feeds 5,000 people – once again calling on his disciples to minister alongside him.  Yet, once his task was complete, the Lord sends the weary disciples across the Sea of Galilee to rest and be refreshed while Jesus himself dismisses the crowds.

From this historical incident in the life and ministry of Jesus, three points germane to the topic are worthy of noting. First, serving others is exhausting. I can safely say I’ve known a level of exhaustion I had not previously considered for 19 years in the pastoral ministry. People have needs and they demand a great deal from those who’ve been tasked with meeting those needs, and this applies to so much more than those in vocational Christian ministry. Parents are worn out by their children, spouses are often tiring, co-workers and employers can be demanding, and church ministry (volunteer and vocational) will eat you alive if you let it. Setting aside your needs and those of your family is exhausting. Anyone who tells you it isn’t is living and ministering in a fairy tale world.

Secondly, rest from people is biblically encouraged. Because meeting others’ needs is so draining, Jesus commanded the disciples to get away from both the people and the work of the ministry he’d commanded them to do. Let me put this in a 21^st century context. If Jesus were here today, I believe he would have told the disciples to leave their churches and the people to whom they were ministering and “forget” about them for a while. Let’s be honest. I am sure the disciples were well received by some and not so well received by others (cf. Mark 6:7-11). We’re not told, but I just bet the disciples had some stories to share! They had to process what they had been doing, preaching, and experiencing. That could not be done if they never stopped serving and got away from people for a while. 

Finally, rest is our primary means of spiritual refreshment. After dismissing the crowds he’d just fed, Jesus got alone for spiritual refreshment – to pray. Why? He was tired too and he had to join the disciples to minister to them – a task I am sure wore him out quite a bit. You have to get away from people and church ministry to refresh and get re-energized so you can rejoin it effectively.

Does this mean it’s OK for a Christian to skip church when he’s on vacation? I will leave it as a matter of conscience, but will add this. As a pastor, I know that when I travel and have chosen to attend a church somewhere else I am still “working.” How so? Once another pastor and his people learn that you too are a pastor, something I don’t intentionally keep hidden, I get sucked into question answering, burden sharing, and a host of other conversations that feel a great deal like the work from which I am vacationing. It eats into my time with my wife and children and interrupts the rest and revitalization we all so greatly need. 

Consider it this way. Do you intentionally go to a similar place of employment as the one where you work while on vacation to find rest and rejuvenation? I seriously doubt it. If a pastor or Christian leader chooses to totally “come apart” and stay in a “secluded place” – apart from people, phones, internet access, or anything even slightly related to his vocational or volunteer ministry – for a while, then I say, “Good!” If a pastor or Christian leader can engage in “vacational” ministry without sacrificing the rest, spiritual refreshment, and family reconnection he so desperately needs, then I say, “Good!”  

Maybe, when it comes to this topic, I'm not much better than Luther Krank in John Grisham's Skipping Christmas. Let’s just not make skipping church on vacation a test of spirituality or ministry dedication.